The More I Write

Remember I was talking about goals the other day – well I refinanced a loan of mine for a lower interest rate. So great.

And good news – I haven’t focused on my impending hospital bill. Knowingly I have already maxed-out with my pharmaceuticals and knowing approximately the damages.

The total of my two-week stay was $150,000 – which isn’t bad considering the last time I was hospitalized here in Boston for three-nights for $60,000. Still a ridiculous amount of money.

I received a bill for $3,700 – and I knew my max out-of-pocket was $2,500, and I was more than halfway there before the stay. That the number was wrong.

I called my insurance company to double-check my max out-of-pocket and they confirmed $2,500. I told them the bill that I received – and they said, they haven’t even seen that bill or the charges. I read each billing charge number and amount and gave them all the info and they said they would reach out to them to get it billed correctly.

I received a bill the other day for $35.00. I am pretty sure that is accurate because there was no sign of the $3700 and they always leave the remaining balance on it.

But let me tell you something, I do not let these things get me anymore, 99% of the time I should say.

When I turned 18 and I was put on the state health insurance, and one time I received bills totally over $2,500. The woman on the phone bullied me and said I had to pay or I was going to court or something to that effect. I got off the phone and I started crying – cause this was my introduction, first real money upset to the healthcare system.  I had seen my mom cry numerous times growing up.

I remember I went to my clinic and they helped me sort it out and they said basically it had not been billed or billed incorrectly. All resolved and I owed $0.

I vowed – no insurance company will ever do that to me again. Back off –

What I have learned, wait three or four months to allow the hospital and the insurance company to debate who is going to pay for what and how much. Do not start paying. I usually don’t believe what I see until two cycles are consistent. Then, even if I don’t like the number I will call.

A friend of mine who has much experience in this arena as well – one time couldn’t pay for her $300 monthly infusion that she had been paying for a long time. She was on a disability income by that point and she called the drug company themselves and said, “I have been paying for this drug for x amount of years, and I can’t do it anymore.”

They approved for her to receive the drug for free. That all happened over the phone. She told me don’t be afraid to call the drug companies directly.

Don’t be bullied.

And if they send you to collections – let them. It does not affect your credit if you pay a small amount. You have to pay something – but it doesn’t affect your credit.

Not once when I have received my credit report has it said a collections company’s name on it, and I have been sent many times mostly because they annoy me.

Pause.

I realized this evening – that I think I want to become a biographer, or write biographies.

I love to research and dig for answers, clues; it is like a mystery. You have to put these missing pieces together – you have to ask questions, and more questions, which often leads you to an answer followed by more questions. I really get lost in it, in a good way.

I worked on this paper for eight hours consistently this weekend, like in one day. I was just intrigued where it was going to go, what I was going to find out, and how it was going to be resolved.

When you look at the bibliography pages – it leads you on another quest. Where did they get their information? Are the sources legit? Do I need to read more – often times the answer is, yes.

You bring in those missing pieces and gather these clues and they start to talk to each other to create this story.  I am truly in awe of The Peabody Sisters by Megan Marshall.

Also – years ago I got to work in the state library archives, had to wear gloves and treat these individual pieces with such care. I had a story I wanted to tell – and it was about women’s health in the 1800s.

I found old letters from husbands directing their wives care, doctors doing things that were not good. Women having to solve their own problems.

It was all in writing – and I got to display their story.  It was really interesting and a lot of fun. It took time but was worth it.

My poetry project has researched involved as well.  I really want to dig into that more once my class is over. Having a student ID is quite helpful in getting into archives.

I may take a memoir class next semester. Partly because it is in a great time slot. Also – when would I ever take a scholarly memoir class if not in grad school?

I want to find out if this particular aspect in my life is worth telling, or perhaps to quietly put it away. I am strikingly unsure.

What I do know – the more I write the easier it becomes.

I want to share a link – I would love to do something for LGBTQ youth. I just haven’t quite found that exact pathway.  All about goals again. Please read.

https://www.today.com/news/couple-opens-wisconsin-s-first-group-home-homeless-lgbtq-youth-t165886

And check out this song from Harriet, the movie. Man, this one hit me.

Btw – still not coughing. Also, I haven’t been exercising on my treadmill as much lately. I truly feel my body needed a treadmill break. I do it, just not as much, but when I do, it is actually easier than before. Been doing more yoga and strength- training.

Please be well. Please be good to yourself. Much love.